i still struggle so much with procrastination... and i always give so much mental energy, but that ends up being not so much actual energy... 

of course i have had progress on this. But idk... i dont know if this is a problem i have with doing tasks or a problem with drawing but im sure they overlap. 

theres so much things interlaced with drawing that i keep pressuring myself about, like my worth as a worker, my future
 
i want to be the best company for myself, i want to be reliable for my self, and i know the best way to do this kinds of things is putting in the hours, but most of the time it seems my instagram feed is more insteresting or that drawing and learning is too hard. maybe i need to learn to focus on one thing at a time? 

trying not to avoid all my feelings all the time might help, and be able to sit with uncomfortable feelings might help sitting with these uncomfortable tasks